Ruth's Personal Statement

I was born in 1962 and spent my childhood moving around the country. My parents were very young (18 and 20 when I was born) and pretty confused. I quickly figured out that they didn't have the answers to the questions that haunted me - questions like "Why am I here?" "What really matters on this earth?" "Why is there so much pain - and what, if anything, can I do about it?"

I was acutely aware of all the suffering around me. I also had an innate sense of reverence for the world, and had some profound mystical experiences as a young child, but I had no idea how to make sense of them. I turned to reading and writing as a way to try to understand my life. Poetry was my first spiritual path, and I followed it all the way to graduate school.

After I got my M.F.A. in Creative Writing in 1985, I moved to San Francisco and got a job as an AIDS educator, a job which deeply stretched and challenged me. Working at the intersection of sexuality, life and death both broke and opened my heart. So did my seven-year relationship with a chronically ill partner, to whom I ultimately donated a kidney.

As I continued writing, I won a number of major awards for my poetry, published five books of poems and e memoir, and became a professor. I enjoyed teaching writing and literature, yet in my soul, I knew I needed to work with people in more essential ways. Driven to figure out how to do that, I hunted down as many transformational healing modalities as I could find and studied them avidly, getting my Ph.D. along the way. Then, although my colleagues thought I was crazy - "Do you know how many poets would give their right arm for your job?!" my department chair exclaimed - I left tenure behind to become a self-employed healer.

During these years, I also went through some shattering changes and losses in my personal life. I grappled with the mental illness and addictions of close family members; I lost a beloved mentor; I moved cross-country twice; I went through a number of painful relationships and breakips. These challenges forced me to face the part of me that had never felt at home on earth, and wasn't at all sure I wanted to be here.

My guides made my choices very clear to me: I could go on as I was, I could leave, or I could say Yes to life.

I chose Door #3 - and, in the words of poet Robert Frost, that has made all the difference.

I have emerged now into a life more wonderful than any I could have imagined. I live with the love of my life, and we support each other's creative and spiritual endeavors with a deep, soul-level love and understanding, as well as plenty of humor. I make my home in a place I love, with trees and animals all around, and a river running down through my back yard. I have the counsel of my wise guides and inner teachers, and the joy and challenge of my mission within me and before me.

And just what is that mission? After more than a decade helping people heal trauma, unblock their creativity and connect to their own spiritual center, I've received further instructions.

My calling at this time is to serve and bring together those extraordinary souls - including you, if you're still reading this! - who deeply know they are here on earth for a reason.

Does this sound like you?

  • You know our planet and our species are in danger.
  • You sense that a different way of living is possible - a way infused with love, connection, collaboration and consciousness.
  • You deeply long to play your part in bringing that way into being.

If so, I can't wait to work with you! It's time.

Much love,

Ruth

To say what or where we came from has nothing to do with what or where we came from. We do not come from there any more, but only from each word that proceeds out of the mouth of the unnamed. - W. S. Merwin